Doing what “it” says = Serenity

James 1:22 “Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves.  Do what it says.” 

One of the greatest tools I was given in the infant stages of my sobriety was the serenity prayer:    

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change (other people, places and things), the courage to change the things I can (me and my thinking) and the wisdom to know the difference.   (Please note that the words in parenthesis are my thoughts.)

Serenity in the Adriatic Sea

 

I found if I could live this simple prayer, to the best of my ability every day, then I would have serenity without drugs, booze or other addicting things…go figure.  And for you non-addicts it means you can have serenity without having to find new homes, more money, more debt, jobs, cars, relationships, restaurants, clothes,  etc…    

The key to working this prayer is to do it in the order in which it is written.  Notice I said working because it takes work to have serenity.   

As a result of working the principals of this prayer on a daily basis I am able to keep my bad moments as bad moments and I no longer allow them to turn into bad days, weeks, months, years, decades etc…  This prayer has taught me how to deal with life on life’s terms.  It has taught me how to do what the good book says.  But, like I said before, it takes work and for me it takes work on  a daily basis.    

Let’s take a look at how we can “work” this prayer.    

The first sentence merely means we need to accept other people, places and things for what they are and understand we cannot change “them” unless they want to be changed.  Accepting does not mean we like what is going on but it allows us to let go and not let others consume our precious brain cells.  I am a firm believer in attraction vs. promotion as well as living the change you want to see in the world; “you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make them drink…but you can make them awful thirsty.”  Just don’t forget you cannot make them drink.  If you are having trouble accepting things you cannot change try praying daily for the willingness to accept the situation and pray for good things to happen for that other person, place or thing or otherwise it will drive you nuts…been there done that.    

The second sentence is all about changing ourselves which is the only thing we can change.  More specifically we need to change our thinking because our actions are a result of our thinking.  As an alcoholic and addict I found early on that I had a thinking problem and not a drinking problem.  The best way to change our thinking is to create boundaries to keep the people, places and things that cause us to go back to our old thinking out of our lives.  The best way to kill anything is to quit feeding it.  We then need to surround ourselves with people, places and things that think the way we want to think.  Lastly we need to work a program (I would suggest the 12 Steps) which involves daily surrender to God through a morning prayer and devotional time, ongoing inventory in order to keep our spirit clean and the willingness to get out of ourselves and serve others.    

The third sentence “the wisdom to know the difference” simply happens if we work the first two sentences the best we can.  Yes, wisdom happens but it takes work.  Alot of people confuse knowledge with wisdom.  Knowledge is knowing the facts whereas wisdom is applying the facts.  I know a lot of knowledgeable Christians that are miserable because they choose not to “do what it says” as James talks about in the scripture above.    

So what is your serenity looking like these days?  Try doing what it says in the serenity prayer and serenity will happen in spite of yourself.    

P.E.A.C.E.    

jay@eaglelaunch.com    

 

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